(Archived from sharon-nc - original forum)

Lynne's comment about speaking about shocking like its common place keeps rolling over in my head. I am one of those people who do that. I am a shocker. I can say oh, and then I shocked, that was after we were at Macy's but before...and we didn't get to...just as casually as if I'd said we went to the Gap before Macy's.
I try not to think about or maybe I do try to think about it. I'm not sure. What I do know is that I am never unprepared to manage a shock - no matter where I am going or who I am going with. I have my emergency medicine stash in my purse at church, at a restaurant, at the mall, anywhere I go. Because I realize that shocking is the most dangerous thing I do, and most likely the most dangerous thing I will ever do in this life. And I have little control over it.
I am cautious of triggers. I am very carefull about what I eat (foods are big on my trigger list), I am carefull what I touch (yep, there are things that I can touch that on a tickly day can cause me to shock), I am carefull, carefull, carefull on trigger avoidance. I shocked two weeks ago. In the last couple of years I have averaged six to eight weeks between shocks. I have gone much longer than that, years in fact, but right now masto is not in good control for me.
Its scary, yes, perhaps that is why I speak about it in such a casual tone, I don't want it to have power over me, and yet it does. I also feel the need not to make a big deal out of it, I fear that my friends and family will pull away. Its quite an odd thing. I struggle with my perceptions on shocking, I realize the danger and the frequency and that at this juncture we are doing medically the best we can. Perhaps I feel that having such a cavalier tone in speaking about shocking takes some of the fear away. In reality it doesn't.

Lynne thank you for that comment, its been interesting to think about.

Sharon in NC
15 September 2008 05:26 PM